Could be our chance

cars are expensive these days, this one is not.

First things first, some housekeeping, or lets call it, a “brand synergy announcement”. Harry’s OK Used Cars, is now the proud subsidiary of Heavenly Bodies. We are under new management! The sign was a very good deal! The cats are playing saxophones, I still don’t really do body work, another sign is in the works, my number is the same, we still hate the boss, and I will throw another party this summer. The seasons change, the name changes, but the mission remains. Fair cars, at a fair price. An appropriate approach to the madness of ownership. And here at Harry’s (a subsidiary of Heavenly Bodies Inc). We know the value of a dollar, we know the fantasy and we know that a mile is a mile.

A buick is a good car to eat a hamburger next to

If the economy will do what it do (collapse). I will remain steadfast in my belief that there is no economy like the economy of the beater. It may be inconvenient and unreliable, but so might be your best friend? We all can hope that our friends may accept us, dents and all. We do bring each other the beautiful gift of kinship, ya know? A nice time goes a long way these days! A bench seat helps. If we got to know each other? How rare is that? Hold space for the beater? Open your heart to the opportunity of disappointment and possibility of heartbreak? Life is chaos already, You may be crawling through your trucks back window to gain entry late at night. Your shifter cable may simply stop working in the hotel parking lot. But does the essential joy of the vehicle just outweigh the stupidity? Can a cold beer, a bench seat and a decent view make up for the pervasive smell of fuel and a dysfunctional 8-track deck? The jury is fucking out I simply don’t know the answer. We are testing theories over here, many scientists are hard at work (trying to fix the door handle). But maybe just get in? Live the fantasy, and let life wash over you (waves and all) because where is the charm in a good dog?

I am currently driving this car, or one just like it. Mine says buick and is brown, this one says chevrolet and is yellow. But they are essentially the same. The 8-track player just destroyed “Signed, sealed, delivered” and I won’t lie, this did upset me. My stock of tapes is limited and I have been on a Stevie Wonder kick. It consumes gasoline like it is going out of style but I think it could use some tuning. For a “big car” it is actually pretty easy to maneuver through the world. It feels and drives the same at any speed (vague and without deference to your commands). It is a genuinely nice car to sit in. The clock does not work but it gives the passenger something to play with because it is also on the opposite end of the dashboard, out of reach and view of the driver. Time is simply not of the essence. Please don’t touch the headliner as it will cover you in a fine powder of 1979 cardboard headliner material. This one looks like it belonged to a now dead public servant at one of the soon to be dead three letter agencies. Liberate this yellow dream machine from the swamp, get out while you still can.

This post is a testament to the medium of craigslist advertisements. How dare I gild the lily when pure poetry exists all around us? You know this man is a true freak because he has 4 cars jammed into his staten island driveway, bumper to bumper just inching out onto the sidewalk. His nosey neighbors, studying curb cut ordinances and carrying a tape measure on a walk (fuck off!). The price is fair if the mileage is to be believed. (have a little faith baby). Aspire! Is it a good car? Not really! It is red and it may just be your best shot.

The poets of craigslist continue, “A hot trip to Florida”. Fortunately your Florida trip can be as Hot as your heart desires because this Riviera stays cool with a modern AC freon conversion and ice blue leather. All sitting behind the fuel sipping (I am averaging 21mpg in my oldsmobile) buick 3800 V6. Did I mention this thing has a touch screen? Imagine a tesla touch screen working in 35 years! Everything is computer, but the kind of computer that got us to the moon, not one that will render you as a ghibli character , action figure, Big tittie anime maid and void your warranty.

Now that we’ve covered our bases, we can indulge in the spring fever. A cold plunge in the newly hot sun. Break out the short skirt and forget that it drops to 40 the moment the sun begins to set. If this tricolor Plymouth Fury doesn’t inspire a vision, we may just need to part ways. Plenty of dealers up and down the road, our buntings just flap that much faster in the breeze. The very same breeze that could be running through your hair in this pillarless mopar. Big engine, big car, big life! Squeeze 3 in the back. This fury wears the correct amount of patina and maybe even some honest rot in the rear quarters. Make your own plans but make sure there is air in the spare. Prayer is proven to keep the oil flowing and AAA is actually a pretty good deal. Everybody’s somebody’s fool!

I love Craigslist and it pains me to see zukfuk eat their lunch with fb marketplace. So before you reactivate the ole meta account to sell a desk, remember, Return! Avoid the metaverse AI slop factory, do not become bogged down in the comments of the local eateries review page. Return! You are a missed connection away from a connection and a few clicks and a bus ride away from a hot set of wheels (or a ford aspire).